A.B.T. Anonymous

"Hi, I'm ______. It's been 3 years since I started working on my thesis. It's not that I don't know what I want to write about...*feigning a cough* I just seem to have been bogged down by real life stuff--work and more work. Maybe I find work enjoyable? *worried laugh* Or perhaps, it's better to chat or play time-consuming facebook applications than finally getting down and dirty with my thesis topic? It's not that I can't write. Don't get me wrong--I WANT TO GET IT OVER AND DONE WITH. Next thing you want to ask, "Why are you wasting your time then?"

*Looking at you straight in the eye*

"I'm stuck between typing all that needs to be typed and reading the remainder of the photocopied materials that I think are needed for my topic."

*Meeting my gaze*

"An excuse that clearly shows your waning interest. Thank you for sharing...Next..."

A daydream inspired by a meeting with a good friend and ex-prof. After talking about transactive memory, he finally shared what it felt like writing his MA thesis. A.B.T. or All But Thesis is one of the worst terms in the academic lexicon. Simply put, the student has completed all the requirements save for the dreaded thesis. Most end this dilemma by either getting hitched, dropping out, taking another course or just finally writing the damn thesis. 

Catharsis accomplished.